Addicted to novelty since 2001

Willy Freed From Earthly Bonds

Keiko, the much discussed star of the Free Willy movies, died and was buried in Norway this week:

Despite the whale’s size, the burial went smoothly, Richards said. Machines dug a hole near the waterline, under cover of darkness, and then slid Keiko slowly a few yards across the snow into his grave, he said. “It was beautiful. He went to the grave quietly, quickly and peacefully, just like he died,” said Richards. Only seven people — including his team and the machine operator — were present. “

Frankly, it’s about time. That whale had a crappy-ass life at the hands of us humans. The sooner he could shuffle off his mortal coil, the better. Mind you, he did have his own foundation, but the newsletters probably got too wet before he could read them.