December 18th, 2004

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Vancouver
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An Odd Call from the Lobby

It’s 11:30 on Friday night, and I’m just finishing up a bit of work in the cave that is my home-office. The phone rings, but the two short rings means that it’s someone calling from the downstairs, outside my building. I answer, and the following conversation ensues with the woman on the other end:

ME: Hello.
HER: Hi. How’s it going?
ME: Pretty good, how’s it going with you?
HER: Pretty good. What are you doing?
ME: Oh, you know, just finishing up some work.
HER: What kind of work?
ME: Just some graphic design stuff.
HER: How old are you?
ME: I’m thirty.
HER: Thirty’s a good age. Are you single?
ME: No, sorry, I’m married. I just had my anniversary, actually.
HER: Congratulations! Do you know anybody in this building that’s single?
ME: I’m sorry, I don’t know anybody else in my building, single or married.
HER: All right, well, have a good evening.
ME: Uh, sure, you too.

And that was that. I got the feeling that she was just buzzing random apartments, hoping to find appropriate males. It reminded me slightly of Species. I’m sure it was just a joke, but are things that desperate for men in Vancouver?

I turned on the TV and changed to the channel that lets you watch people buzzing in. Sure enough, I watched her and her friend try a bunch of other apartments. It wasn’t apparent if they were happy with the results. I snapped a photo, which you can see after the jump.

Comments: 9 Responses so far

Ross Thomas
December 18th, 2004
7:52 pm

Reminds me vaguely of an experience I had in a Holiday Inn. The phone woke me up about 8am.

Me: …yeah?
Guy: Hi.
Me: Uh, hi.
Guy: What are you doing?
Me: I’m… lying in bed.

(I was still a bit sleep-confused at this point. In hindsight, telling him I was lying in bed was probably a mistake.)

Guy: Mmm. What do you look like?
Me: What?
Guy: Are you tall?
Me: Um. I’ma go now, kay?
Guy: Aww. Okay. Byebye.

I can only assume he was calling round all the other rooms in the hotel looking for a man to, I dunno, read his screenplay. Or something.

It was way more disturbing than it sounds.

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Adriana
December 18th, 2004
10:08 pm

Too weird!

You don’t know any of your neighbours? Guess that’s part of highrise living, but I think it’s a little odd as well (please take no offense).

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Andrea
December 19th, 2004
12:16 am

It was probably a couple of young suburbanites in search of single guys that they perceive to live the affluent Yaletown lifestyle. Sounds like a gutsier version of what girls did when I was a teenager. They’d look through the White Pages for teen lines, then call the ones in ritzier neighbourhoods (usually went along with having a teen phone) in search of a well-positioned young male. One of my friends hooked up with a guy who ended up in jail a while later. I don’t recommend meeting people this way!

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Nick
December 19th, 2004
3:26 am

Maybe Darren doesn’t know any of his neighbours cos they avoid him for fear of ending up in his blog :-)

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Jeff
December 19th, 2004
3:14 pm

I once made the mistake of answering a payphone in Vancouver. It was on comox if I remember correctly.

The man on the other end asked if I liked the idea of making extra money.

Already knowing no good would come from answering-I answered.

He then told me he would pay me to come over to his place a few times a week and out on a pair of boxing gloves and ‘do an S&M trip’ on him. He said he would pay me $10.00 for every ‘load of cum’ I delivered.

I declined. I’m sure he was watching from one of the nearby condo towers.

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Cheryl
December 19th, 2004
6:31 pm

That just creeps me out, and seeing the securitycam shot makes it even creepier. =shudder=

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Derek
December 20th, 2004
10:14 am

I wonder how many years (if ever) it will before that young woman discovers her photo on your blog.

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double-plus-ungood
December 20th, 2004
4:13 pm

Strange. I had a phone call very much like that once in the early eighties:

Me: “Hello?”
Her: “Hi. Do you mind if I ask you a couple of questions?”
Me: (thinking it was a survey) “Um, sure, okay.”
Her: “How old are you.”
Me: “Twenty-four.”
Her: “Are you single?”
Me: “Yes.”
Her: “What turns you on?”
Me: “What??”
Her: “What turns you on?”
Me: “Sexually?”
Her: “Yes.”
Me: “That’s kind of a personal question, isn’t it?”
Her: “It won’t hurt you to answer it.”
Me: “Yeah, but I’m still not going to answer it.”
Her: “Oh, come on.”
Me: “Nope, sorry.”
Her: <click>

After the call, I just had to tell my housemates about it. Best suggestion from one of them was that I should have replied “Wierdo telephone calls” to the last question.

[Reply]

Derek
December 20th, 2004
4:23 pm

This New York Times Magazine quote becomes more relevant: “In the age of blogs, all citizens, no matter how obscure, will have to adjust their behavior to the possibility that someone may be writing about them.”

Or photographing, as it may be.

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