April 17th, 2006

Filed under:
Movies

Rejected Titles for ‘Snakes on a Plane’

The Web has been a-buzzing about this plainly named new film starring Samuel L. Jackson. I’ve been kicking around titles the studio might have rejected:

  • Sharks on a Boat
  • Bears on a Train
  • The Black Guy Lives Through Act One
  • Business Class, Business Asp
  • A Viper in the Exit Row
  • Snake Bombers of Saudi Arabia
  • Untitled Screenplay Combining Phobias

Well, those are all pretty lame. I also had Air-de-Lance but that was too awful and obscure to even include in my list. Surely somebody has something better?

Comments: 7 Responses so far

“Monty’s Flying Python Circus”?

Reply

To be honest. I thought it was a joke.

http://feeds.feedburner.com/boingboing/iBag?m=784

It seems like an entry for the Bruce Schneier – Terrorist Movie Plot contest.

Reply

It’s a lot like the movie “Vampires on a Plane”.

Reply

I can’t take credit for all of these… but these are some possible sequels.

Spiders on a Bus.
Chimps on a Ferris wheel.
Sharks on a Hovercraft
Lions on a roller coaster.
Fleas on a Bicycle.
Tse-Tse Flies on a Roller Skate
“Your Mom in A Bus Station”
Coyotes in a Subaru
mo0nkleys all over your bitch ass
Bedbugs on a BoogieBoard.
Lampreys on a Jet Ski
Prions in a Cell Wall!
Leeches on an UltraLight
Sharp Objects In A Drawer
Scorpions in a Rollerskate
Dingos on a Pogo Stick
Koalas On A Submarine
Murderous Clowns Under A Bed.
Leopards on a Segway.
Old People at McDonalds

Reply

I think ‘Sharp Objects In A Drawer’ is the stand-out there. Though I like the pictures that ‘Leopards on a Segway’ and ‘Koalas On A Submarine’ make in my head.

Reply

Gerbils on a Jungle Gym
Smurfs on Smack
Chainsaws on a Choo Choo
Dandruff on my Dresser
Caterwauling Cats on a Careening Catamaran
Bushes in the White House

Reply

‘Skyslither’
‘A Reptile Dysfunction’
‘Planes, Snakes and Terroristmobiles’
‘Mortal Coils’
‘Snakejack’
‘Serpentine Draft’
‘Once Bitten, Twice No Fly’
‘Captain Cobra’
’8 Snakes in a Travel Bag’
‘V for Viper (On a Plane)’
‘Flight SN4K3′
‘Air Snake’
‘Going Down in Hiss-tory’
‘Hissy Fit’
‘Snakersonic’
‘Passenger Python’
‘Sidewinder in the Sky’
‘Aisle, Window or Snakepit?’
‘Aviophidiophobia’

Really the possibilites are endless. Although I sympathize with the studio, its hard to combine snakes and planes in a catchy way.

Reply

Add a comment