October 1, 2002

Acronym Shortage Threatens Web Services Community

Web services developers across the globe pounded keyboards in frustration today over the increasing scarcity of cool acronyms. Mirroring the domain name gold rush of the nineties, each passing week sees the number of funky and clever acronyms reduced. Several leading Web services companies have called in trauma counsellors to assuage the fears of skittish architects.

Marshall Salmonberry, lead technical architect at Web services vendor WebGherkins.com, expressed his fears. "I can't sleep at night. I toss and I turn, trying to think of the right acronym for our new compressed archive format. I just think, SOAP, WSDL, UDDI...they're all so clever and witty! They abbreviate so effectively! I try endless combinations of letters, but each time...each...time...I'm sorry, I can't go on."

WebGherkins.com spokesperson Al Hypko comforted Salmonberry. "It's really a crisis. I was in the men's room this morning and there are acronyms scrawled all over the walls. Our development team is at its wit's end. We're just S.O.L. Great, there's another one gone!"

The defaced Weberific.com men's room

The Web services industry's hopes rest on a recent WebGherkins.com development: MorphAcronym. Salmonberry brightened when discussing this service currently in Beta testing. "Finally, a useful Web service--you send us the phrase you want to acronymize and we'll send you back an available acronym in four to six weeks. Brilliant, eh?"

Several leading Web services companies have organized a commission to look into this growing issue. The Standards Initiative on Normalizing Business Acronym Distribution or SINBAD will lay down a standard specification for creating acronyms. Barring compatibility issues, the specification should be available in April, 2012.


    Disclaimer: Webservile.com uses invented names, except in cases where public figures are being satirized. Any other use of real names is accidental and unintentional. Another satire site by Darren Barefoot.