October 9th, 2003

Filed under:
Sports
8 Comments »

The Original Whizzinator

Can you guess what this is?

Used with our organic heat pads, it is GUARANTEED to maintain body temperature for EIGHT HOURS! And our quality production and materials assures you that the WHIZZINATOR© will let it flow, again and again, anytime, anywhere you need it!

That’s right, it’s a fake penis and reservoir for fooling drug tests. It comes in five different colours (photos of fake penises ahead)–white, tan, latino, brown and black. What colour is latino? There’s even dehydrated urine for sale! Unethical bastards.

I read about this, and how one Texan was tripped up because his unit seemed to go ‘clink’ while in the bathroom stall.

UPDATE: Welcome, Whizzinator searchers. You’ve no doubt arrived because of the recent news of Onterrio Smith being in the possession of such a device. You might be interested in this follow-up entry, in which my athletic friend describes a Canadian doping test, and how they watch you like a hawk.

Comments: 8 Responses so far

michelle!
October 9th, 2003
11:16 am

what color is “latino”?

[Reply]

michelle!
October 9th, 2003
11:17 am

HA.. i posted that and then continued reading— you had the same question…

BTW I love your site.

[Reply]

Sue
October 9th, 2003
11:44 am

How the heck do you find these things??

[Reply]

Darren
October 9th, 2003
11:47 am

I have a sort of chaos theory approach to surfing the Web.

[Reply]

John
October 9th, 2003
1:39 pm

A nice tool for finding some obscure web sites is StumbleUpon (http://www.stumbleupon.com) a browser toolbar (Mozilla based browsers and Internet Explorer supported). Go check it out!

[Reply]

David Sedaris on the Stadium Pal | DarrenBarefoot.com
February 2nd, 2007
11:58 am

[...] Continuing with an ongoing urination device theme (see also here and here), here’s David Sedaris reading an entertaining essay about the Stadium Pal, a portable urinal. Thanks to Waxy for the link. [...]

IamLegend
February 28th, 2007
3:38 pm

Why does this thing have a nutsack?

[Reply]

Johnny Potsmoker
December 7th, 2008
4:37 am

I dont understand why such a negative attitude, its a great invention, definatly worth the 150 bucks to someone who has to piss for bullshit reasons, however I do question some of the atheletes, as to they probably arent just smoking pot.

[Reply]

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